JACKO's BACK! SHAMAU!!

MJ had an embarassing comeback Wednesday night in London at the World Music Awards.

After an hour of the crowd's waiting and anticipating, Jackson, 48, finally came on stage to accept the Diamond Award from Beyonce, who said: "If it wasn't for Michael Jackson, I would have never, ever performed. He has made such an impact on my life and every performer's life. Michael Jackson, I love you!" TMI BEYONCE, JUST TOO MUCH INFORMATION, GIRL!!

Driven to the stage in a blacked-out Mercedes surrounded by more than 20 security guards, Jackson grasped the award but had to wait for the crowd's screams to die down before he could be heard. "There have been so many who have loved me and stood by me throughout my 42 years I have been part of this business," he said. "I would like to thank my wonderful children, Paris, Prince, and Blanket, for their unconditional love and support." ESPECIALLY BLANKET, WHO SMOTHERS HIM WITH SUPPORT. YIKES.

Jackson then disappeared off stage, leaving R&B star Chris Brown to perform his version of "Thriller," backed by a dozen zombie dancers.

It was past 10:30 p.m. by the time Jackson finally performed his few lines, of "We Are The World," backed by a group of young children (HAVEN'T YOU LEARNED ANYTHING ABOUT NOT HAVING CHILDREN AROUND, MJ?) Observers noted he failed to hit some of the higher notes. LOOKS LIKE IT WASN'T A GOOD NIGHT FOR THE TESTIS!

AT LAST! The LESBIANS COME OUT...Sort of....

Terminator 3 star Kristanna Loken (remember when she kissed Pink in 2004?) has given her biggest hint yet she is dating Lost actress Michelle Rodriguez. Loken was recently interviewed by gay publication The Advocate, where she was asked about stories linking her with her sexy co-star on the set of BloodRayne. When asked about rumours that the two hooked up during the shoot, Loken laughed and took a deep breath before replying, "There is the $64,000 question. Um...I don't even know how to answer that." She was then asked if the two had fun partying together, Loken replied, "Uh-huh," while smiling slyly. When the interviewer said her silence "said volumes," the actress replied, "Just don't look upstairs, OK?" The couple have been frequently photographed together with their arms around each other in Los Angeles.

KRISTANNA: MY, WHAT A BIG SWORD YOU HAVE!!
MICHELLE: YOU SHOULD CHECK OUT MY TORPEDOES

PINK LIKES IT BLONDE

Another video from Kelly

For all of you who LOVE Kelly Likes Shoes, here's one more:

Meanwhile, this is going on in Japan

Just the way Tom likes it; FROM THE BACK END

KAT(I)E MAKES A NICE TOP TO TOM'S BOTTOM

MADGEY in Red....

So pissed off about the heat she's getting for adopting an African baby, Madonna had to dress up in her "civilian" clothes and go see a movie (probably Marie Antoinette) so that she could feel whole again this past weekend.



By the way—Sofia Coppola's Marie Antionette sucks. Shocker, I know. But it failed mainly because it's another movie about Sofia Coppola (a rich bich who feels alone in the world, and just wants to be adored). Poo Poo Sofia. Your movie smells of Poo Poo.

WHY DOES SHE ALWAYS LOOK LIKE SHE'S JUST FINISHED EATING A TURD?

STATING THE OBVIOUS

Hello people. I'm back, and with a vengeance. I've been MIA because I went on a bit of a bender to celebrate all those celebrity sisters who've been dumping those lame ass husbands who've leeched off of them financially and can't seem to satisfy them emotionally or sexually. First, Whitney blew our minds by divorcing Bobby Brown, proving that crack is not the only thing that's whack. AND NOW, Britney has dumped Kevin Federetarded. Aces, Brit! It only took you a couple of years to realize he was a greasy ne'er-do-well hobo, but way to go.


Her first husband, Jason Alexander, spoke about Brit's impending divorce from K-Fed:

Alexander, whom Spears married in Las Vegas in 2004 (their marriage was annulled 55 hours later-remember that disaster?), tells TV's Extra of Federline: "I don't hate the guy. … I think he made an idiot of himself." Asked whether he thought Federline married the pop star for her money, Alexander replied, "I don't know, the only thing he's done since they've been married is spend money." As for the potential custody battle over the couple's two sons, Sean Preston, 1, and Jayden James, Alexander said, "He won't get the kids ... he can't take care of his first two." (Federline has two children with ex-girlfriend Shar Jackson.)

What a shocker.

Jude Law and Sienna Miller have reportedly split for good, blaming "fundamental differences" for the end of their three year relationship. The pair only reunited earlier this year after splitting in 2005 when Law's affair with his children's nanny Daisy Wright was revealed by a national newspaper.


What a shame it is. I felt like the two idiotic twits balanced each other's raging egos so well. Serves you right, Jude, you little Mary Poppins-seducer. And as for you Sienna, now I suppose you can take your two-bit Scarlett-Johansen acting carreer and make something out of it.