Naomi Campbell was arrested AGAIN for assault. She didn't hit her maid with her cell phone again, but get this: she apparently assaulted her DRUG COUNCELOR. WHO DOES THAT? WHO IS THAT INSANE? I enlisted the help of Phylicia Rashad (i found out we had the same oral surgeon when I got my wisdom teeth yanked out, and she glided into the office just like when she used to make a suave entrance on The Cosby Show). Anyhow, she always has such a polite and poised way of giving tough love, so she promptly wrote this letter to Naomi:
Dear Naomi,
Come here. Let me hold your hand, child. Let me try to explain to you in a calm manner (so that you don't beat me to a pulp) that hitting your drug councelor is not going to get you a daytime talk show or a reality tv show like Tyra Banks. Your anger management issues are BEYOND the kind of stunts that Liza ("the hulk") Minnelli pulled on David Gest when she used to slap him around. Your tantrums are lethal, bitch. Get it together.
Love,
Claire Huxtable
1 comment:
Elle Cue, I'd watch yer butt! She's gonna hunt you down and beat you with a phone!
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